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island girl in progressMaturity means wanting to go back in time for the express purpose of kicking your own Butt 12月16日 again, so quick?I'm as surprised as you....
Someone reminded me of a song that I posted as a blog...oh....way...way...back on an island far away. In another lifetime.
and of course it got me thinking.
and it got me to go back and read some of that stuff...to maybe understand why I've been such a fricken Scrooge about Christmas this past couple years. I took the kidlet to a friends to decorate the tree, we aren't putting one up, they are doing renos in the apt....so...Kidlet and the friend are putting the lights on the tree, singing carols, I'm feeling a bit blah about the whole nonsense, and sick to boot...
I'm hoping maybe this year I'll feel better about it...but I've yet to be convinced.
Amy girl, I wasn't dreaming I do have a date...I'll let ya know about it after it happens! 12月14日 you really never know what life has in store do you?So, been a couple weeks again...
I know...bad blogger....I messed up my shoulder, been getting it worked on and doesn't allow for much time around here (cause it'd mess it up worse)
I was feeling prety chiefed about some long awaited repairs being done around my apartment last week....and then I got a cold, which was still not too bad....then I went to take the kidlet to her lessons and I think my brakes are FUBARed...sigh
and then what happens tonight?
I get asked out, by someone I've known for years and chat with off and on....and out of the blue...there it is. I have a date.
maybe it was a hallucination from the cold medicine? 11月26日 6"Yes, 6"
it's about how much hair I had cut off....I'm still not sure what possesed me to take the plunge, but I do know it feels good, I can actually do something with it after wearing a hard hat all day, instead of always having a ball cap on. Going back this week to get it colored because I hate the dull colour it is. Can't wait to see how it turns out cause I don't know what colour it's gonna be, thinking auburn/reddish...who knows what my hairdresser will have in mind though, and I trust her implicitly so she'll do what she sees as the best colour. It's a Christmas gift from a family member who knew I wanted to do it, I had figured I would get to it in the new year...now I get to start the new year with a makeover already in place, have to start to think what the next phase should be cause maybe I could make it a new years resolution.
I've started on the Christmas thing, just barely though, still have a lot to do...I expect to start hearing about setting up the tree anytime now, oh hang on, I've already been asked...I said in a couple weeks, I may cave sooner, depending on how the pleading gets after the Santa Clause parade.
It's been rather wet here of late, feels like the other coast...late november and we have had no snow...with a few days that have been in the double digits...oh and a lot of rain. I'd rather the rain, don't have to shovel it at least.
Wonder if we'll have a green Christmas this year? 11月12日 does this thing still work?So, I'm gonna try this again...
I think some of my angst over posting here is the trying to not give too much away. I'd love to say what the hell happened to make me leave "paradise"...I'd love to say what I'm doing for a life these days....but.....I'm worried that some misplaced word could cost me all I've worked for. I could start a new blog, but then I'd lose some of the stuff I've written here...some of it is pretty precious to me.
In life as in here, I'm very much a 'this is who I am, take me or leave me, I don't care' kind of person. I'm starting to realize that that is a difficult concept for some people to understand. I also realize that there is a side of me that some people just don't get!
I've been playing with the online dating world, and I mean playing(I don't get out much and not much in the online dating world makes me want to even make the time to get out)....again...take me for who I am. The pics I choose to share with those who have to see a pic NOW are not the most glamorous....I'm usually in a ballcap or hardhat, if you can't see past that, it ain't gonna work!
In addition to the online dating thing I'm also still playing at mrs robinson from time to time, not someone I see a future with, but we enjoy some similar stuff and mentally he can keep up. I think we both feel kinda guilty about our arrangement from time to time though...me more so lately because there is someone I work with that interests me. Were anything to develop there, the mrs robinson games would end immediately... no harm, no foul.
I don't know if I'm prepared to even broach an 'office romance'...I do however know he is someone I would like to know on a personal level, just friends would be just fine....you know how chemistry is, never know if it'll be there til you get closer. I see potential, I'm still not sure if it's a good fit though! lol If I were to leave my job, I wouldn't hesitate to ask him out....I said to one of my girlfriends that if he were a girl I worked with that I was interested in a friendship with, I wouldn't hesitate to ask him to go for a coffee/lunch/whatever. In reality I'm interested in a friendship with him....in my dirty dreams, I'm interested in a whole other side of him!
Off to do some more visiting.....
CU round? 9月1日 Give it to meYeah, I know
I'm not here much
and I still miss it
So, back inside my brain, what brought me here tonight was watching the 'Give it to me Video'....and I was reading some comments on it.
I was surprised to see comments about how this video is just stuff she has done before, reworked.
There's a point to it... First time I heard this song I thought 'way to go showing all those naysayers from the 80's what a flash in the pan you WEREN'T' Then I listened to the lyrics...and thought 'yep, that's just what she's saying there, Look at me I'm still kicking ass, where are you?'
Tonight was the first time I saw the video and I thought the intro was old footage....and then I realized...it's meant like the song, to show the world she still has IT, no matter what they say or think...has it and always did! With Madonna there is always a point...you just have to open your mind, you'll see it... I've meant to come here a bunch of times lately..and yet....I haven't made it.
So much to say....and so much going on and nothing happening.
life
still in progress
6月8日 still not in the swing...I know....still being a bad blogger....sigh.... I come here and wonder how I ever managed to post on a daily basis...I'd say that I had the time cause I didn't have a life, but I did have a life and that was often what gave me the inspiration to write the posts. I know that I need to start surfing some of my favorite bloggers here, they also gave me inspiration from time to time....my pattern would be open a word doc, start some kind of post, surf and see who was saying what....then see what popped out. I'm sitting here right now, wishing I had a lawn mower, I see a sea of dandelions in the back yard...the back yard is really nothing but weeds, if I owned this property I'd be killing whats out there and laying new soil and reseeding it or maybe even laying sod. It's a shame because it's a nice big yard and the kidlet would use it more if it was more inviting. I keep seeing pictures of Paris Hilton and I wonder if I'm the only person who wonders what the hell is wrong with that girls left eye...maybe it's her right eye that is the problem....I swear everytime I see a pic of that girl I think she's either wasted or she has a glass eye that she can't control. I'm sorry, she's downright strange looking. then again that's just my opinion isn't it what else.... well....work is going well, get to have a day on the water this week. Doing a clean up slash training exercise for Oceans Day, really looking forward to it on all levels...that is as long as it's a half decent day, one never knows what the weather is going to do. I miss being in the Caribbean for the weather, almost always a nice day on the ocean there. Then again, I'm really happy with how my life is progressing, I guess the next big step will be finding someone I want to share it with. I've had a couple flings since I became single when I came home...they have been just that though, flings. I was too busy with sorting my life out and going to school and the like to invest time or energy into anything more. Now I'm at a point that I'd like to have a relationship, but I'm also happy the way things are...I look at some of my male friends who are single and I realize that if they are indicative of what's out there, I'm not that interested in getting tied down. Seems that lots of them want someone who will look after them like a mommy...sorry, I have one kid, don't need another. I want someone who can look after themselves and who can be an equal partner, willing to cook and clean without prompting...maybe even someone who's a bit of a metrosexual. Lord knows I could use a guy who had some fashion sense to help out this t-shirt and jeans, coverall wearing, non-girly girl! hell every once in a while I think I should say pack it all and just switch teams! Then again, I know that things are the same on that side of the fence...one of my favorite sayings is after all 'the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, till you realize it takes the same shit to grow it' such is life I guess....as always, a work in progress.... off to do some surfing.....catch you all later 5月26日 Working girlYep, it's official, I'm EMPLOYED!!! woo hoo!! Love the place, and the crowd I'm working with. One of the girls I've been in school with for the past year and a half is also working there...I don't mind being the only girl, but it's nice to have another around, especially one I know I get along with. Tomorrow I'm back to the gym, have to get back in better shape! Somehow over this school year I managed to put on about 30lbs...I weigh as much now as I did when I was 9 months pregnant with the munchkin....not happy about that....and since I know I have to do a medical for my job in a couple months, I best take care of that extra baggage. Somehow when you are wearing coveralls all the time you don't notice you've gained weight...till you try to 'dress up' to go out....ICK... What else...it's starting to get green here, the trees are in bud and I expect they'll all go 'POOF' in the next couple days...I'm so looking forward to that, the view out my window will be so lovely when the trees in the back yard all fill in.Won't be getting any time off to enjoy the summer, but I should be out on the water a couple times with work and we do lots of work in the yard when it's nice out, so at least I'll be out on the few nice days we get here!! Way better than having to sit in an office all day. or being stuck in the barns with no windows.... I'm really liking how the future is looking! |
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